Dating After 50: Finding Love and Companionship on Your Terms

While sipping my morning green tea and scrolling through social media, I came across a post from an old friend who just announced her recent engagement. “Well, good for her.” I thought. But she wasn’t the first of my friends who were now in new relationships. And from what I’ve learned, dating after 50 can be a delightful adventure, filled with laughter, self-discovery, and yes, maybe even the occasional awkward moment that makes for a great story later. So where do you begin? Today, let’s talk about how to find love and companionship on your terms, no matter your age, background, or relationship history.

EMBRACE YOUR AGE (AND EVERYTHING THAT COMES WITH IT)

When I was 20, I sometimes worried about what people thought of my clothes, my hair, or my career choice. As I aged, I realized I had earned the right to worry less about outside opinions and focus more on what I wanted. Whether that meant wearing bright red lipstick, studying Japanese, or traveling to the other side of the world. It was what made me happy, and I knew I didn’t have to change it for anyone. I started to embrace who I was and it built my confidence. Nothing says “I’ve got this” quite like showing the world you’re comfortable in your own skin.

As we age, we must all own our own stories. Our past experiences, good, bad and ugly, have shaped us into the fabulous people we are today. Unfortunately, sometimes when we find someone we have a spark with, we are reluctant to share anything but the best about our lives. Big mistake. If they can’t handle our journey, they’re probably not the right fit. And certainly not worth the time to find out.

It’s also important to set boundaries with a potential mate right from the beginning. When you decide that dating in your 50s is for you, you must also be aware of what works for you in a relationship and what doesn’t. So, if you do meet someone you click with, don’t be shy about stating your deal-breakers, remember you’re dating on your terms now.

ONLINE DATING – WILLING TO TAKE A CHANCE?

Ah, dating online after 50. A realm where people use photos from 10 years ago, write bios that could rival a mystery novel, and occasionally forget to mention minor details like being married. Despite the quirks, online dating platforms for singles over 50 can be a great way to connect with people you might never meet otherwise. Forbes Health lists the following as the top five apps focused on women and men over 50, making it easier to find someone in your age group who’s also ready to mingle.

1. eharmony

2. Date My Age

3. Match

4. Dating.com

5. Our Time

RECONNECT WITH YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLES

Believe it or not, your circle of friends, colleagues, or even acquaintances from your church or volunteer group can be a treasure trove of potential connections who are also interested in dating after 50. Sometimes, a friend of a friend (of a friend) might be just the person you’d like to learn more about.

So how can you be proactive? Try hosting a casual get-together, like a potluck dinner or a game night, and encourage friends to bring a guest. Who knows? You might meet someone who shares your love of charades or deviled eggs.

Community events can also be a great way to meet people. Whether it’s a local charity fundraiser, an art show, or a dance class, showing up is half the battle. You’ll expand your social circle and have fun doing it.

This humorous book shares fun experiences of a woman who entered the dating world over 50. The read is as entertaining as it is instructive.

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DON’T BE AFRAID TO GO OLD-SCHOOL

No matter what, we live in a digital age, but that doesn’t mean you can’t meet someone the old-fashioned way, like striking up a conversation at the grocery store or the library. This way you can take a look of what kinds of food he’s buying or books he’s reading. Good information to have.

You can also check out groups or clubs for single adults over 50. It could be a choir, a dance group or an organized game night. Shared interests often lead to shared connections. And though it may sound corny, speed dating events can be a hoot, especially if you bring a friend for moral support. You chat with multiple people in one evening, and if the conversation flows, you might just find a connection.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF ALONG THE WAY

Dating can be exciting, but it can also be nerve-wracking. Between scheduling meetups, reading profiles, and deciding whether to text back immediately or wait a strategic 12 hours. That’s where self-care comes in.

Before getting overwhelmed with the whole process, set some time aside for yourself. It could be a relaxing bubble bath or a good book, or a weekend getaway, just be sure to take time to recharge, so you can address any propositions or opportunities with calm and confidence.

Also be sure to stay on top of your good eating habits, exercise routine and consistent sleeping schedule. Being in good physical condition contributes to your emotional health as well. Don’t underestimate it.

REMEMBER, NONE OF US ARE PERFECT!

Let’s face it: dating can be awkward at any age. My sister went on a first date after 50 and accidentally called the gentleman by her ex’s name (oops!). She was mortified, but the good news was that moments like these often make for the best stories. Laugh it off, learn from it, and move on. Her take was: “If he couldn’t handle a little imperfection, he wouldn’t have been my cup of tea anyway.”

FINAL THOUGHTS

Not everyone is looking for a marriage proposal. Maybe you just want a companion for weekend road trips, a dance partner for salsa night, or someone to chat with over coffee. Figure out what you want from this new chapter of your love life, and don’t let anyone tell you it’s not valid.

Listen ladies . . . women dating after 50 isn’t about “starting over”, it’s about starting new. You’ve got life experience, a clearer sense of self, and (hopefully) a robust sense of humor to handle whatever comes your way. So go ahead: put yourself out there, embrace the unknown, and remember that love and companionship come in all shapes and sizes. Above all, make sure you’re having fun. Because if you’re not enjoying the ride, what’s the point?